


Sweeter than Forgiveness

by deedeeinfj



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-09
Updated: 2013-02-09
Packaged: 2017-11-28 17:49:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/677155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deedeeinfj/pseuds/deedeeinfj
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Snape prank and its aftermath</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweeter than Forgiveness

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published on Livejournal, 2003.

"What the  _fuck_  were you thinking, Sirius?" James leapt up from an armchair by the fire, closely followed by Peter, who was anxiously twisting his hands.   
  
Not much of a greeting, but frankly, Sirius hadn't expected better. "It wasn't supposed to happen like that," he mumbled. The portrait hole closed behind him, and he leaned against it. James had come within feet of him, but Sirius found himself unable to meet his friend's eyes. "None of that was supposed to--"   
  
"Yeah, well, it did," said James loudly. He obviously didn't care if he woke up all of Gryffindor. "Snape knows everything now, Moony's alone tonight, and gods only know what he'll do to himself. Then when he's in the hospital wing tomorrow morning, you can tell him what you did. I would just like to know what you were thinking. Really, I'd like to know. And where have you been while all this was going on? Spying from somewhere? Couldn't wait to see someone murdered and have your best friend executed for it?"   
  
"If James hadn't been there..." Peter started, then trailed off.   
  
Sirius looked up, hoping he'd be able to speak in spite of the knot in his stomach. "I never planned for Snape to enter the tree at all," he said quietly. "I was going to hide somewhere and hex him for being a spying git. None of this--"   
  
"And why weren't you there?" James interrupted angrily. "If you had all this perfectly planned out, then where the hell were you?"   
  
"Filch. Filch saw me and caught me for that detention we escaped last week." He sighed heavily. "He locked me in the trophy room. And I tried -- I tried to use the mirror to warn you, but you must have been on the grounds, or already transformed. I pounded on the door and shouted at Filch, but he never answered me, so all I could do was hope that you or Peter would stop it." He finally met James' dark, angry eyes. "I've never felt so awful and scared in my life."   
  
"Good," James replied mercilessly. And why should he be sympathetic? Sirius felt more enraged at himself than anyone else possibly could.   
  
"It seemed like ages, and then Dumbledore came in, and he had this look on his face--" Sirius paused. He would not cry in front of James Potter. He never had, and he never intended to. He cleared his throat and blinked. "I thought the worst had happened." There was no response from James. "Then he told me what happened. That you had stopped it just in time, and that Snape's okay."   
  
"Snape can eat shit for all I care. Look what you've done to Remus." James' face had never looked so cold. "You betrayed him."   
  
"I know."   
  
"I wouldn't blame him if he never forgave you. I don't know if  _I'm_  going to forgive you. You almost got  _me_  killed, you bastard."   
  
"I know." Sirius barely heard himself; he wondered if they had been able to.   
  
"He didn't mean for it to happen," said Peter timidly. "It was an accident."   
  
James opened his mouth to say something else, then seemed to decide against it. Instead, he clenched his jaw, turned, and headed for the stairs. Peter looked back and forth between them, as if he were trying to choose between them.   
  
"Go on," Sirius muttered. "Go on to bed."   
  
Peter didn't need to be told twice. He turned and scurried after James, leaving Sirius alone in the Common Room, still leaning against the portrait hole. The fire crackled, and Sirius reached up to pull off his already loosened tie. He glanced up at the darkened stairs, then stared down at the floor again.   
  
Then, hardly thinking, he opened the portrait hole and crept downstairs and out of the castle. On any other occasion, he would have been terrified to do this without James' cloak, but tonight he didn't care. He transformed into Padfoot and ran to the Willow. This, too, was difficult without Peter there to prod the knot. He winced as the tree hit him repeatedly, as if it knew how much he deserved it. Finally, he found the knot and stepped inside the passageway.   
  
Before his other senses registered anything, the dog's ears pricked up at the sound of vicious growling, then a pained howl. He ran down the passage, searching desperately for Moony. Another howl led him upstairs, where he found the wolf clawing at its own shoulder. He barked, and the wolf turned to him with fangs bared.   
  
 _Moony_ , he wanted to say. He whimpered instead and approached the wolf hesitantly. He nuzzled Moony's nose with his own, eliciting a soft whine. Brushing his head alongside the wolf's, he stopped when he reached the raw shoulder and licked it gently. Padfoot lifted a paw to coax the wolf to lie down, and it obeyed. Moony seemed to be bleeding everywhere, his gold eyes half-closed, his lean body rising and falling slowly. The dog moved around him slowly, licking wounds and whimpering occasionally. Finally, he curled up close to the wolf, sometimes lapping at its face softly. It fell asleep some time later, but Padfoot stayed awake all night.   
  
At dawn, when Remus lay on the floor covered in bites, scratches, and bruises, Padfoot inched away from his friend's warmth slowly, so as not to wake him. He stood and once again set about licking the wounds that weren't covered by Remus' tatty clothes. The gashes looked ten times worse in daylight. There was nothing else he knew how to do.   
  
"Sirius," the lips spoke, barely moving.   
  
He swiped his tongue gently across the scratched cheek. He didn't want to transform yet. As a dog, he didn't have to speak. Where was Madam Pomfrey? Remus needed bandages, medicine, and a bed as soon as possible. Because of him.   
  
"Change back," Remus whispered, reaching up and resting his hand behind one of Padfoot's ears. "Change back, Sirius."   
  
The dog's eyes blinked and stared at Remus for a moment, and then Padfoot was replaced by Sirius, who felt somewhat comforted by the feel of his friend's hand on his jawline. The hand slid down, and Remus stared at him. "Remus, I'm sorry," he said quickly. "It's my fault."   
  
The weary eyes stayed fixed on his. "What happened?"   
  
"A stupid prank. A stupid prank, Moony, that went all wrong, and I almost killed Snape, and almost got you killed, and James... Shit. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Remus."   
  
"I almost killed Snape," said Remus quietly. "They would've... I don't even want to know what they would've done to me. Sirius..." He paused. "Tell me this was an accident."   
  
"I didn't intend for Snape to get anywhere near the Willow."   
  
"Okay."   
  
"I'm sorry. I'm a bastard."   
  
He lowered his head into his hands, partly because it felt heavier than it ever had, and partly because his eyes stung. The silence seemed to last for days, and then he felt fingers slipping over one of his hands, pulling it away from his face.  
  
"Yeah, you are."   
  
Sirius lifted his head, but did not look at Remus. There was no reply for that; it was a simple truth, and now he should move on and take care of things. "I'm going to find Madam Pomfrey. You need someone to take care of you."   
  
"I think Padfoot did a good job," said Remus. Sirius raised his eyes slowly to his friends, suddenly realizing that Remus' fingers were still wrapped over his.   
  
"Gods, look what I did to you," he muttered. "You'll be out of classes for a week."   
  
Without pausing for thought, he extended his free hand and touched Remus' cheek with his fingertips, feeling the raised edges of the deep scratches. Then he must have forgotten that he wasn't Padfoot, because he leaned forward and kissed the wound. He heard Remus' soft, quick intake of air, then felt the shaky exhalation of it against his neck. Some part of him demanded to feel that breath moving into his own mouth, so he brushed his lips over Moony's.   
  
Another shaky breath, and Remus' mouth opened under his. Thought was now entirely abandoned; something else drove him now. Perhaps the gentle fingers that reached up to touch his jaw, sliding over the nape of his neck and into his hair. Perhaps the warmth of his own name being whispered against his lips. Perhaps the realization that he finally knew what Remus tasted like. And perhaps it was because his eyes didn't sting anymore, and he didn't care that Remus saw.  
  
"You... hospital... need... need bandages," he mumbled. That made a little sense -- as much as he could muster, anyway.   
  
Remus pulled him closer. "I need this more."   
  
There would be time to sort all this out in his head later. Especially if Prongs decided not to speak to him for a while, at least until he got tired of Peter's inane company. Sirius only knew that whatever this was, he wanted it again and again, more of it, and he never wanted to lose it. Something sweeter than forgiveness.


End file.
